I was fueling at the truck stop in Florida,chatting with the hog hauler fueling at the pump next to me. He was telling me about the time he had pulled off the road to take his 8 hour break,when a bunch of Russians pulled him out of his truck at gun point. Made him open his trailer,all the time yelling "Where are they". One had a g.p.s. locater device. He makes his way thru the hogs and stops about half way through the trailer. Stops ,reaches down through the hop crap, and picks up a cell phone. Im thinking,"Some truck drivers have nothing better to do but think up wild stories to tell his fellow truckers." Cindy Crawford,Selma Hayek,Johann Carlo, and Jenette Goldstein are hot!! ---One Truck Drivers Opinion--- erldwgstruckermovies.com

Is Cindy Crawford really supposed to be staggeringly beautiful? I mean, she's okay, with her pointy chin and beauty spot, but is she any more attractive than, say, Madeleine Stowe, Sean Young, or Jennifer Connolly? Crawford is taller than the others, true. She could be on an all-girl's Olympic basketball team. But it would be hard to rank order the beauty parade that's been on screen lately. When you get so close to the top it becomes a matter of stylistic choice, almost arbitrary.

There's another woman in this movie, a homely middle-aged KGB agent who demolishes men with a single kick to the head. It could be argued that a woman with such a talent for meting out punishment might be a more exciting date than some marshmallow ex-model.

Anyway, Crawford, the ex-model at hand, isn't bad. She has legs the length of a giraffe's and she takes two showers at the beginning of the movie and changes her T shirt in front of the camera once. I don't mean to be too critical of her appearance.

It's no wonder that her bare midriff prompts the goggle-eyed Baldwin to put a cigar in his mouth and try to light it. I take this to be symbolism although, to be sure, "sometimes a cigar is just a cigar." But then she cozzens some computer nerd so much that he winds up "fiddling with my joystick." Can a joystick sometimes just be a joystick too? Of course she can't act but we can't count that as a demerit because nobody else in the movie can act either, so the absence of skill on her part is hardly noticeable. Her performance though does put on display at least one of her attractive features, in addition to the other two, and that is an endearing lisp. "Pizza" comes out "PEET-tha." Kind of nice. Gives her a vulnerable quality, you know? Speaking of her vulnerability brings up the question of the plot, alas. See -- these ex-KGB agents try to murder her in every way possible -- shooting, blowing up her house, shooting yet again, and again. Then, towards the end, they decide she can't be killed but rather she must be interrogated. End of discussion of plot.

I found myself wishing the heavies weren't all ex-Russian KGB agents because the movie was shot, after all, in 1994, five years after the collapse of the USSR, which either makes the villains out of date or the screenwriters unimaginative in their search for heavies. Maybe both.

It doesn't matter really, except that there are some people of an impressionable age who might be tempted to take this cartoon as a serious reflection of reality. Their minds might be warped enough by exposure to these stereotypes that they grow up imagining all Russians have faces with the general contours and texture of potatoes. The heavies all scowl and sneer and speak with one or another foreign accent. Was it Oliver Cromwell who said, "Take me for what I am, warts and all"? Makeup has given the chief heavy a prominent wart right in the middle of his forehead, like a third eye, I suppose so we don't mix him up with the others.

These ex-Soviet Seals are something special. They are "experts in electronics," the film tells us, but that doesn't do them justice. Their equipment has positively supernatural attributes. For instance, they use an infra-red heat sensor that can not only penetrate walls but can detect that the leading lady is wearing high heels as well. And their radio direction finder can "triangulate" a transmitter's position all by itself.

Essentially the whole movie is one long chase. None of it makes too much sense. After Baldwin saves Crawford's life a dozen times over she suddenly turns on him angrily then runs away. Shortly afterward, aboard a freight train, they have a physical fight and then she immediately falls into his arms and they make love. Unfortunately it's one of those love-making scenes in which such arty effects as dappled spots of blue light move across patches of undifferentiated limbs, and it's interrupted by one of the agents who has a laser-sight-equipped weapon that plants a red circle on Baldwin's butt. At least Crawford notices this. I can understand why Baldwin might not have.

There are some gags and would-be jokes and sassy lines sprinkled through this melange of explosions and shootings and slow-motion fireballs. It doesn't add up to much but it's so slam bang that I found it kind of fun. I really do wish we had some generic villain for these types of movies though. Those impressionable minds -- the ones that can't remember the difference between Russia and the Soviet Union -- worry me at times.

****SPOILERS***** Action packed police movie set in Florida about a group of mobsters consisting of ex-KGB agents led by former KBG agent Kazak, Steven Berkoff. The mobsters use an off-shore freighter, The Tortugo, to tap into underwater bank cables and steal millions of dollars in bank transactions. That plan falls apart when the feisty and pretty civil lawyer Kate McQueen, Cindy Crawford, got in their way and had to be eliminated in order for them to keep up their illegal activities.

Attempting to assassinate Kate at the beginning of the movie as she was jogging down swanky Ocean Drive she has Homicide Detective Max Kirpatrick, William Baldwin, assigned to be with her around the clock to watch protect and defend her, it's a real hard job but somebody's got to do it, against other attempts on her life. This gang of ex-KGB thugs really mean business as they blow up half of South Florida to get the pair, Max & Kate. As usual, in the movies, Max & Kate are always one step ahead of them and the mobsters no matter how much men and firepower as well as electronic equipment that they have are no match against the two who have almost nothing but the clothes on their back, and some times not even that, to fight them with. Far more violent then most action police movies with almost the entire cast wiped out, with the exception of Max & Kate of course, by the ending credits.

The action scenes of "Fair Game" are a lot like the old Saturday afternoon cliff-hangers with Max & Kate looking like they've had it and then just getting away from the bad guys every fifteen or so minutes in the movie. The bad guys are as bad as they can get in what they do and try to do, you can just imagine anyone trying to hurt or kill Cindy Crawford has to be the biggest enemy against hu-MAN-ity in history.

The last half-hour of the movie is non-stop action on the roads and highways as well as railroad trains and ships in the South Florida area with the most graphic boat sinking since, even though movie was made in 1995 but I haven't seen it until 2004, the movie "Titanic" in 1997.

Outlandish but at the same time ironic ending with the head gangster Kazak instead of trying to escape the sinking and exploding ship tries to punch into the ships computer the information that he needs to complete his illegal bank transaction of almost one billion dollars! All this with him knowing very well that he won't make it out alive by taking so much time doing it! It's as if Kazak just wanted to die rich.