Never Too Young to Die

1986

Action / Adventure / Comedy / Drama

14
Rotten Tomatoes Critics - Rotten 51% · 1 reviews
Rotten Tomatoes Audience - Spilled 51% · 100 ratings
IMDb Rating 4.8/10 10 2254 2.3K

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Plot summary

Secret agent Drew Stargrove is brutally murdered by the ruthless hermaphrodite gang leader Velvet Von Ragnar. The murdered secret agent's son, Lance Stargrove is thrust into the dangerous and intriguing world of secret agents and espionage when he seeks revenge. Danja Deerling teams up with Lance as his sidekick and love interest.

Director

Top cast

Tara Buckman as Sacrificed Punkette
John Stamos as Lance Stargrove
Patrick Wright as Exploding Biker
Robert Englund as Riley
720p.BLU 1080p.BLU
784.71 MB
1280*694
English 2.0
NR
23.976 fps
1 hr 32 min
Seeds ...
1.44 GB
1920*1040
English 2.0
NR
23.976 fps
1 hr 32 min
Seeds 6

Movie Reviews

Reviewed by sttia 5 / 10

Gene Simmons is the only reason to see this one.

Gene made me laugh until I cried. He took this horrible mess and ran with it. The rest of the cast...well, what rest of the cast? This one is a real stinker but if you're a hardcore KISS fan you can appreciate the utter hilariousness of Gene's performance. Don't get me wrong, this movie overall is the worst I have ever seen but if seeing Gene Simmons in drag will live on tape long enough for my grandkids to see it, then it's worth it. LOL I pull it out of the cabinet whenever I need a good gut busting laugh with a horrible script.
Reviewed by thesar-2 5 / 10

A Bond Jr. Vanity Project

Maybe, unlike the title, I'm getting too old, but dang it...this was fun.

Oh, this is bad, terribly bad, but in a good way. The ole: So bad, it's good. Well, thanks, How Did This Get Made? I listened to their podcast review of this bad flick first, and then watched the movie. And now, I have to go back and listen to it all over again. And why? They were spot on with their enjoyment of this crazily stupid movie.

And yes, I'll be spending 270 minutes on this film. (90 minutes for the podcast, 90 for the actual film and another 90 re-listening to said podcast.) And I'm not ashamed to admit it.

The plot revolves around a non-gymkata gymnast whose dad is absent for most of his tournaments and it turns out, Daddy's a spy! Well, when Father's out of the picture, it's up to Junior and Vanity to take on Rocky Horror so the Batman won't Begin.

Is this for everyone? Absolutely not. It's for people who both appreciate cinema and at the same time, need some cheese with their wine.

***

Final thoughts: With these bad movies, I generally find them for free on YouTube. I did not in this case, so I simply checked my Amazon Prime account and BAM! there it was. For free. Well with my account, that is. So, I had to see it. And it was so deliciously Bmovie, I have to recommend it.

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