Santa Claws (1996) YIFY - Download Movie TORRENT

Reviewed by capkronos 4 / 10

Nekkid scream queens offed by a psychopathic killer

John Russo nearly hits rock bottom with this disastrous cheapie misleadingly promoted as another killer-dressed-as-Santa-Claus-movie. Raven Quinn (Debbie Rochon) not only has to deal with a cheating husband (John Mowod) but also with trouble from women's groups and her in-laws when she accepts the lead role in the racy movie "A Scream Queen Christmas." If things couldn't get any worse, Raven also becomes the target of an obsessed psycho, her next-door neighbor Wayne (Grant Kramer), who has a shrine to her in his home, drugs her kids, messes around with a mannequin and kills cast and crew participating in the movie with a three-pronged garden claw.There's virtually no gore or violence, but there are long scenes of young women with large silicone knockers stripping out of glittery costumes to pad out the running time. Debbie Rochon is easily the best this film has to offer in terms of good-looking babes and the only one of the bunch I found to be really attractive. (She's also pretty fun to watch with her clothes on, as well). It's also fun spotting Marilyn Eastman, Karl Hardman, Bill Hinzman and John Russo (all of whom appeared in the original NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD) in small roles here. Otherwise this is a complete waste of time.Russo also made the T & A tie-in tape SCREAM QUEEN NAKED CHRISTMAS featuring Kramer, Rochon, Christine Cavalier (from W.A.V.E. Productions) and others from this movie reprising their roles (and removing their clothes).Score: 3 out of 10 (thanks mainly to Debbie)

Reviewed by gavcrimson 2 / 10

SantaClaws

What Blood Shack was to Ray Dennis Steckler, Santa Claws is to a collective best refered to as "the makers of Night of the Living Dead, whose names weren't George A Romero". Its insultingly bad as an actual movie, but exerts a morbid curiosity as a kind of pseudo-documentary on the lives of those involved. If you want to see Night of the Living Dead actors decades after their brush with fame, Santa Claws trots out Marilyn Eastman, Karl Hardman, Bill Hinzman and John Russo, in scenes that look like they were shot in their own Pittsburgh homes and places of work. The younger cast is represented by lots of wannabe scream queens, and John Mowod, the male lead from Hinzman's Flesh Eater/Zombie Nosh. Mowod is chiefly memorable for his resemblance to both Paul McCartney and Sylvester Stallone, and should have probably sought out a career as a celebrity impersonator rather than an actor. Its all basically an excuse to publicize 'Scream Queens Illustrated' Russo's horror themed T&A mag that promoted the boobs, bums and careers of various Scream Queen actresses of the time. Santa Claws is mainly set at the Scream Queens Illustrated offices, where you get to see Hinzman and Hardman at their day jobs, shooting jerk off material for the magazine. Natch' the setting also allows for lingering shots of various Scream Queens Illustrated and Night of the Living Dead merchandise.Occasionally Santa Claws remembers it is meant to be a horror film, and begrudgingly tears itself away from the T&A and self-promotion, in favour of focusing on a lackluster killer dressed in a Santa outfit who murders various secondary characters at the Scream Queens offices with a gardening fork. Barely anyone appears concerned by how sleazy and third rate they are portraying themselves as. The only possible exception being Scream Queen Debbie Rochon, whose role has the feel of a good publicity exercise. Not only is Rochon's character, Raven Quinn, portrayed as a scream queen with a heart of gold, but she is also a single mother whose life is being made a misery by her scumbag ex-husband (played by the Macca/Rambo lookalike) yet always makes herself available to even the most 'needy' of her fans. A credibility straining aspect to the film that also provides its biggest laugh. If you thought the Caroline Munro/Joe Spinell romance in Maniac was a little hard to swallow, here Rochon's character not only lets an unkempt, obviously obsessed, anti-social weirdo into her private life, but lets him babysit her kids as well !!!

Reviewed by grantss 2 / 10

Terrible, no matter how low you set your expectations

I had pretty low expectations for this. On paper this seems like a typical cheap B-grade slasher-horror film. In reality it's even worse.It is cheap and a slasher-horror but calling it B-grade would be flattery. The plot is very basic and what there is doesn't make much sense. Production values are incredibly poor. Direction is woeful: some of the scenes seem more like a slapstick comedy than a drama.Dialogue is laughable and, allied with this, performances are poor. Worst of all is the guy who plays the slasher-murderer. So bad you'd think it is a comedy.Nothing positive at all about this movie except than it is quite short (83 minutes) so at least the pain of watching this is over quickly.

Santa Claws

1996

Horror

Santa Claws

1996

Horror

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Movie Reviews

Nekkid scream queens offed by a psychopathic killer

SantaClaws

Terrible, no matter how low you set your expectations

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