Everything negative written about this movie is true, but mainly based on high expectations ("Tarantino" in the titles is absolutely misguiding). However if you have some free time, cola or beer and snack, do not expect ANY fresh idea from a movie and just want to relax - you can go and watch it without hesitations. No really, that's the good "upper B-class" with all attributes of biker's movie like dust, guns, leather jackets, shootings in desert and babes. Authors even added another "cool" killing device similar to cattle gun in "No Country for Old Men". Protagonist's ("Pistolero") face is so sour like he has been fed half-a-dozen of lemons through his rectum, but other actors honestly do their job. Just don't expect anything else besides of features described above and you likely to be satisfied.

I wish I could write the following: "HELL RIDE is one hell of a ride." Unfortunately, I can't. The bikers in this movie do get to ride some sizzling hot women, so all is not forsaken. Larry Bishop's homage to biker pics tries hard to tart up its terrible script with a lot of cinematic lip gloss, but a turd is a turd, no matter how vigorously you polish it. The "story" is a lazy excuse for profanity, badly staged violence, and sleazy sex. Without the sleazy sex, this would be something of a bust. Imagine if a bunch of cult and counterculture actors got together for a reunion and filmed that reunion. Well, "Hell Ride" is that film. I'm sure Quentin Tarantino (the presenter) and his buddies had a great time partying on the Weinstein dime. They all look like they're having a great time; a lot of bare breasts get ogled and fondled (thank Christ!), and some decent performances do emerge from Michael Madsen and Dennis Hopper. As stated earlier, the women are very, very hot, and Bishop's camera zeroes right in on the bits and butts that count. The deliberately washed out, tilt focus photography feels very old hat, and the direct steals from many of Leone's films only serve to underline the bankruptcy of talent behind the key roles in this wanna-be of a biker flick. One of the most disappointing aspects of "Hell Ride" is the lack of hellish bike action. Do not expect even one-tenth of the action of a classic like "Mad Max", a film itself that homaged (stole from) "Born Losers", amongst others, but emerged with a fresh synthesis of its influences. Can you hear that churning sound? It's AIP spinning in its grave.

HELL RIDE is an attempt at a modern day biker movie, a throwback to the popular sub-genre of the '60s and early '70s. Apparently, executive producer Quentin Tarantino told writer/director/star Larry Bishop to make the "greatest biker movie of all time", so the guy certainly had his work cut out. Unfortunately, what he's done is exactly the opposite – he's managed to create one of the dumbest biker flicks ever made.

Larry Bishop seems to think he's God's gift to film-making, but in reality he's a complete joke. His direction is flat and boring, and his script is even worse; none of it hangs together, and the dialogue is forced and cheesy beyond belief. Bishop's an even worse actor and I hated the smarmy, supposedly charismatic gang leader he plays here; this is a complete vanity project and it's excruciatingly embarrassing for all involved.

The rest of the movie seems to consist of washed-up actors wondering what happened to their careers. Dennis Hopper gives a performance the gist of which makes you think he smoked a little bit too much of that dope back in the day; Michael Madsen is just bored and boring, and doesn't even try. Vinnie Jones is a stock villain with zero character development, and the less said about David Carradine's cheesy cameo the better. At least Tarantino had the good sense not to appear.

So, in all, this is an awful, awful film. No action, no acting to speak of, poor dialogue and a worse story that meanders all over the place in search of meaning. It also manages to exploit women something terrible, so it's memorably sleazy at least, but that's it.