This movie broke my brain.

The number of times I yelled, "OMG." Or, "WHAT DO YOU MEAN!?!?" Or, "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!"

This movie is absolute bottom-of-the-barrel trash quality. On every level. In every aspect of filmmaking. There's no point in listing them all out. This movie is 8 stars on the SoBad scale. It's the dumbest, worst thing ever. (1 viewing, 7/7/2023)

SPOILERS

There are infinity things to make fun of. Here are some things I noted down as I was watching:

This movie has the gall to reference James Bond when a character orders a martini shaken, not stirred. This movie has the gall to completely rip off mission impossible. They even steal a line from Spider-Man (see my headline above). And a character does the Black Widow pose from the Avengers.

There is a scene where they're watching some news footage of a man promoting a fight. Later, they go to see that man in person, and it's the exact same footage/dialogue of him promoting the fight. Are you kidding me? You couldn't film another 5 second scene with one actor?

I'm never one to complain when a woman wins a fight against a bigger man. We're watching a movie with imaginary characters. James Bond can beat up a guy three times his size. That's his character, he's THAT good. In Sheroes, on the other hand, it's a fight between a "skater girl" and what amounts to a professional MMA fighter... Are you for realing me?

By the end of this movie, these women are super spies... In a span of a few days... With their only training being target practice. WHO WROTE THIS?!?!?

There is a CGI shot of a plane. It's just flying, not an action scene. And it literally made me yell out, "WHAT IS THAT?!?!?!" It looks like a PS2 game. Vehicles are one of the easiest things to CGI. How is it this bad? And if it is, why would you even use that shot. It's completely unnecessary.

I can't even do it. This is insanity. There is a scene where Diamond gets to the head cartel guy with her pistol pointed at him. He gets up and walks towards her like he's not afraid. Then he sees a red dot on his chest and suddenly stops, looking very concerned. And they show Ezra with a sniper, "I got him." I don't understand. Is the pistol not enough? Is the guy immune to pistol bullets and his only weakness is sniper bullets?

Then when he threatens to follow them home and kill them all, she shoots the two poisonous spider terrariums on the wall behind him. Then IMMEDIATELY in the next shot, he has two spiders on his face, looking like he's dying. Did her bullets have a shockwave effect that launched the spiders out of the terrariums and onto his face, and caused them to be so startled that they instantaneously bit him????????

Also, why wouldn't she just shoot him? You know, so he doesn't immediately come after you... EXACTLY like he does. Then Diamond throws the gun to Ryder instead of shooting the guy herself. I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

Even the end credits song is hysterical.

Right, well I was actually expecting the 2023 movie "Sheroes" to be an action comedy when I sat down to watch it. I had never heard about the movie prior to sitting down to watch it, so I wasn't really sure on just what I was getting into.

And having just sat through 91 minutes of "Sheroes", I have to say wow. Just wow! This movie, from writer and director Jordan Gertner was just a bitter pill to swallow. While the storyline started out adequately, and definitely seemed like a comedy, the movie just quickly took a turn and become an action movie. But it just didn't feel right in any way, especially since the characters were so very unlikely action heroines. They went from partying young adults to suddenly becoming highly trained ladies capable of taking down a Thai drug cartel singlehandedly, something which several countries had been unsuccessful in doing. Yeah, that was very plausible and believable.

The storyline in the movie just felt awkward, because I am sure that writer and director Jordan Gertner were fully serious about the plot, storyline, characters and the contents of the story.

While I wasn't familiar with the cast ensemble, I will say that the actresses and actors on the cast list actually performed adequately, despite of a very laughable script they had to work with.

If you enjoy action movies, then perhaps you would get a kick out of watching "Sheroes", if you can get past the fact that the director was fully serious about what was transpiring on the screen. I managed to sit through the movie, and found some bizarre, odd entertainment to the ludicrous plot. However, this is not a movie that I will ever return to watch a second time.

My rating of writer and director Jordan Gertner's 2023 movie "Sheroes" lands on a four out of ten stars.

This movie gotta be one of the worst movies I've seen this year, and I watch Lifetime movies for fun. I don't know who thought this movie was a good idea. Did the people filming this movie think it was a good idea too? There's no way people weren't actually on drugs during production. There's Skai Jackson with an RPG, the creepy girl from Orphan doing a lap dance, Batwoman with Streetfighter reference, and a COD montage footage. None of it was good and it is as fever dreamish as it sounds. The acting felt like everyone knew it was bs and a cash grab except for one individual. She wasn't good, in fact, her acting was atrocious, it was like watching a skinwalker learn to be human and talk in English with Jim Carrey's mask on. 2/10.