'Guardians,' or 'Zashchitniki,' as the Russian title would have it, has a reputation that precedes it. I recall well watching the first trailer prior to its release, and being intrigued. I also remember how quickly and thoroughly the completed film was panned, across the board. Yet my curiosity could only be sated by seeing it for myself. More than anything else, I'm disappointed.

In both its writing and direction, 'Guardians' is direct and unsubtle to the point of absurdity. Every possible bit of exposition is delivered in the first few minutes, including opening credits that cement the nature of these superheroes and visualize their origin. This opening sequence is at once adequate in its purpose, while also perhaps too indiscreetly showing its hand - moviegoers don't actually want to see how the meat gets made, but we get the whole picture.

Dialogue and plot points are all ham-fisted and forthright beyond all reason, disallowing the cast any opportunity to exercise their craft or meaningfully inhabit their roles. Action sequences follow this bent while also being executed with such flawless perfection as to actively shred our suspension of disbelief. Every character has perfect knowledge of anything happening; just as there's no nuance in the picture for the audience to pick up on, there are not truly any secrets in the narrative for characters to discover.

Not one scene or emotional beat is given the chance to manifest, linger, and resolve of its own accord - I don't think I've ever seen another movie as forcefully, strenuously fast-paced as this. 'Guardians' does technically possess all those elements we would expect of a modern-day superhero film, but they are glossed over with such a slippery, waxy sheen that the picture blows right past them. It wouldn't be wrong to say this feels like a parody or caricature of a comic book flick, but perhaps more to the point, it's like this movie is a supercondensed microcosm of the genre. And that's a big problem, seeing as how this style of film is all about showing us how big, grand, and expansive the universe can be in all its possibilities.

From a technical standpoint, I think 'Guardians' is actually just fine. Makeup, hair, costume design and wardrobe, set design and decoration, art direction, and fight choreography all look swell as far a I'm concerned. I think the sound design is good, and the original music of composer Georgiy Zheryakov. On the other hand, like the action sequences, special effects and computer-generated visuals mostly have the opposite problem of the typical subpar B-movie: usually we anticipate effects that fail to blend seamlessly into the real world, as seen on camera, because of how poor they are. Here, the CGI is so carefully, lovingly rendered that it looks too unbelievably impeccable to seem real.

I don't generally like to bad-mouth actors in a film - after all, they can only work with the material they're given from the writer, and the instruction imparted by the director. Moreover, knowing nothing of the cast of 'Guardians,' I don't want to make any snap judgments. But I do think it's safe to say that Andrei Gavrilov's screenplay and Sarik Andreasyan's direction conspire to rob the actors of any opportunity to actually... well, act. The whole film moves so quickly - again, distinctly and pointedly bereft of all subtlety - that the cast seems to have no significant agency at all. We've seen what world-class actors are reduced to in the films of Uwe Boll; I have no specific reason to think this situation is any different.

What's most remarkable, though, is that I really think 'Guardians' could have been a good movie. It could have been a good franchise, for that matter. As inelegantly as it's exhibited, the ideas in the narrative have fun potential that's locked away by the sheer aggressiveness and gracelessness of the film's construction. If Gavrilov, Andreasyan, and editor Georgiy Isaakyan allowed scenes, dialogue, and characters to breathe on their own, this wouldn't have been a 90-minute speed demon. For all the narrative content slammed through the funnel of its abbreviated runtime, 'Guardians' could and should have easily, actually, been 2 hours long at the bare minimum, or even a couple movies in and of itself - to say nothing of possibly developing additional features from the threads left dangling at this movie's conclusion. I would have liked to have learned more about these characters, and to have seen this cast flex their muscles. As it is, that just wasn't possible.

It's worth noting, in passing, that as viewers our attention is so enraptured with the indelicate presentation that by comparison we hardly notice the clear effort to ape successful Hollywood superhero features of the years preceding this production. The similarity of some scenes is unmistakable, and the Russian superheroes themselves are echoes of readily identifiable comic book properties. But in the time it takes us to process that recognition, we're already two scenes ahead, so the mimicry hardly even matters.

This is such an odd movie. I admire the concept, the narrative had potential, and I would have liked to see these ideas and this cast given real life. But for as preposterously direct, straightforward - and, once more, highly unsubtle - as the picture is, it feels like a warped facsimile of the superhero epic it could have been. It's a shame, really.

'Guardians,' or 'Zashchitniki,' is far from the worst movie you've ever going to see. Yet so unsound, deficient, and inhibitive is its build that one could be forgiven for thinking there was conscious intent by the film-makers to undercut their own production.

Recommended for curious, persevering, and open-minded audiences.

I don't know why people are trying to say this movie is good, because it is not. First the good parts, the cinematic, music and special effects are pretty decent. And the bad, how can I put this, the movie has no pace, the way they start the team it's laughable, "wanna join? sure". The stiff face major blonde whatever struggles to show emotions and empathy, but it just makes you laugh at her failing to do so, and the list goes on and on, the acting is really terrible.

OK, we get it, small budget, but that doesn't mean the story,editing and acting has to be so low.